How to Make the Most of Your Free 15-Minute Consultation With a Prospective Therapist
Fifteen minutes goes quickly, and the call is also an important step: most therapists who offer a 15-minute phone or video consultation don’t charge for it, and it’s a low-stakes way to attempt find out whether someone is right for you. Keep in mind that it ultimately is a ‘vibe check’ more than anything else. That said, here’s how to use it well.
Remember Who the Call Is For
The call is a chance for the two of you to check fit, and the consultation exists for your benefit, so you can be sure the therapist suits you. That matters because research reviewed by the American Psychological Association points to the relationship between client and therapist as the most critical variable, beyond the treatment method itself.
Fifteen minutes can’t prove a relationship will work, but it can tell you whether the therapist is definitely a bad fit. I’ve had clients share nightmare calls where the therapist made huge assumptions about them, interrupted them, or unknowingly showed themselves to have little to no familiarity with the client’s identity or specific issues.
Before the Call: Do Five Minutes of Prep
Write down your “why.” Jotting down your concerns beforehand is the first step in preparing. A few bullet points are enough: what’s going on, how long, and what you hope will change. Keep it short, because you won’t have time to tell the whole story. And you want time to ask the therapist some questions yourself!
Shortlist and skim. Look at a therapist’s website, specialties, experience, and approach to see if they line up with your values and needs. That way you won’t spend your 15 minutes on things already answered in their bio.
Write down your questions. With only 15 minutes, a prepared list matters. Pick your top three or four so the call doesn’t run out before the ones you care about. Try to be specific as possible about where you are coming from, what you are potentially concerned about, and why you are asking the questions. Otherwise, the therapist will inevitably answer general questions generally and you’ll be on to the next consult call without realizing you may have missed out on your ideal fit.
During the Call: What to Ask
“Have you worked with concerns like mine?” Ask directly whether they’ve actually worked with the issues you need help with, which can save you both time and frustration. And just as importantly, '‘have you received specific training or consultation regarding concerns like mine?’
“What does a typical session look like?” The answer shows how they structure sessions and whether their approach fits your goals. This question can also be a chance to ask how they work- but worry less about asking about specific modalities and more about the vision they sketch of the work together.
“What do you do when you get stuck?’ It’s rare, but some therapists video record sessions (with your consent of course) and receive ongoing consultation with master therapists. I do both, for example, and that’s why clients rarely plateau with me for more than a week.
“What are your strengths and limitations?” A therapist should be upfront about their limitations, and reluctance to discuss them can be a red flag. Therapists that can indicate they have continued to learn and develop as therapists via trainings, consultation, and active efforts long after graduating from therapy school is a great sign.
The practicalities. Ask about rates, qualifications, and session logistics so you can plan your budget.
If you’re seeking help with something sensitive, such as sexual concerns, say so plainly and ask how they approach it. Watch how comfortable they sound, and be sure to check beforehand if they have any clear expertise in the subject matter. Sex therapy is not something therapists get training in by default, so unless they have specific training in it, for example, they are likely flying by the seat of their pants.
Pay Attention to How You Feel
Their credentials are only half the picture. The best measure during a consultation is how you feel, and a good fit will make you feel in good hands even in 15 minutes. Ask yourself:
Did they listen, or rush me?
Did their questions feel useful?
Could I imagine telling this person hard things?
Also keep in mind that alliance, the collaborative bond between therapist and client, is an important aspect of psychotherapy across many approaches. It can also take time to develop, just like any relationship, so you are looking for potential fit here- not whether you feel like best friends or totally relaxed. Remember, a good therapist wears many hats. With your permission, they will always keep your safety in mind while both supporting and challenging you. Therapy can be anxiety provoking because it is, by definition, edgy!
Finally, keep in mind that you are really looking for red flags here. You can’t really know, unfortunately, how the therapy will go without trying a therapist out for several sessions.
Before You Hang Up
Ask about next steps. If it feels like a good fit, ask what they recommend you do to prepare for your first session. Ask about availability, cancellation policy, and how soon you could start.
You Don’t Have to Decide on the Spot
It’s fine to say, “Thank you, I’m going to think about it.” Compare notes if you spoke with more than one person. And if the fit isn’t there, remember that you don’t need all your questions answered right away, and that a mismatch isn’t a failure on your part. It’s information. Keep looking.